what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
