Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I want to have your abortion
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
