we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
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