dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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