dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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