So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I need a burrito and a hug.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests đ
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing âHappy Birthdayâ to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, âWhy didnât you sing along?!?â I responded, âI donât know him. I donât give a shit if he has a happy birthday.â
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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