I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
how do flat chested girls get laid?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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