Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
Randomize
