i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
So, were they human bite marks at least?
Your guess is as good as mine.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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