Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
