there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I need a burrito and a hug.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
