oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Just pissed in my own closet. Had no idea adult dinner parties could he so awesome.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I know her cup size but not her name....
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