who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
