Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Your vagina doesn't want to be violated with garnishes. I get it.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
Randomize
