I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
