can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize