no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
If that was your dad, he is hot
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
They don't exactly give out small business loans to start-up dealers
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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