He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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