Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
Randomize
