it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
