It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
tell me about the fingering
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