Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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