i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
