what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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