what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Randomize
