i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
I am now being bribed with one orgasm per every meal I eat. This is the best anorexia therapy ever
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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