K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
Swine flu is the new snow day.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize