On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
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