I must be too annoying 4 u.
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Randomize
