THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
Randomize
