it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
