I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
