lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
I'm eating all of the evidence.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
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