we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Thought you might like this. Had a dance off with an andy bernard look alike and pissed my bed. All in one night.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
Randomize
