Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
