on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
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