I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
