wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I just discovered how perfect a shot glass is for putting your chicken nugget dipping sauces into. Like I'll probably do this when I'm a mother feeding my children.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
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