Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
So I just went to clothing optional bar
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Randomize