you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize