Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
My bullwhip has saved my life tonight and gotten me laid. I'm gonna be Indiana Jones every Halloween!
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize
