3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I'm passing your future prison.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
Randomize
