He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
My cat licked the coke mirror and now is giving me dirty looks. Bet money she has the drip.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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