I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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