You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
