its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
nutella sex= disaster
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Randomize
