sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize
