Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
