nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I locked my keys in my car in front of planned parenthood. I'm terrified of going inside to ask to borrow a clothes hangar.
Just tell them you need to fix a mistake real quick.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Randomize
