turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
