Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
